owesilisa ongaganiwe uba ngumfana aze afe

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kusadliwa ngoludala                                                                                   C.T MSIMANG

LONA wumfanekiso otshengisa izithandani ezijabulile othandweni lwazo. Ngokwesizulu kuthiwa uma umfana esezimisele ukuyithatha intombi, ubeya kuyona afike ayicele ukuba imedlulisele kuyise.     isithombe: shutterstock

NGELEDLULE, ngaphansi kwendima ebanzi yokuganana, sikhulume kabanzi ngomemulo oyisigaba esimqoka sokukhula komntwana wentombazane. Kanti phambilini sasithinte udaba lwelobolo nemvelaphi yalo. 

Ukugana nokuganwa kuwuku-phelela kwalawo mabanga akho ukukhula. Ongaganiwe akakapheleli ebuntwini, okwenza ukuba ngesiko owesilisa waziwa ngokuthi uwumfana, kungakhathaleki ukuthi useneminyaka emingaki yobudala. 

Akahlali ebandla aphendulane namadoda ngisho angaze abe mpunga ekhanda. Bekuba njalo futhi nakowesifazane ongendanga oba yintombazane aze afe. Ubengahlali adle esithebeni namakhosikazi.

Abangamagagu okukhuluma bathi zintathu kuphela izinsuku ezibalulekile empilweni yomuntu: olokuqala wusuku azalwa ngalo; olwesibili kube wusuku agana noma aganwa ngalo, olwesithathu kube wusuku afa ngalo. 

Ukubaluleka kokuganana kugcizelelwa kubantwana kusuka beqala ukubona izinto, kuthi uma kuzelwe umfana, kuthiwe uyotho-lela unina umalokazana, nxa kuyintombazane, kuthiwe iyotholela uyise izinkomo.

Umfanyana usezokhula azi ukuthi uyobe akenzanga lutho emhlabeni engatholelanga unina umalokazana, ngokunjalo nentombazane uma ingatholelanga uyise amabheka. 

Uma umfana elokhu eyiziba eyokuthatha kanti usekhulile, wayekhuzwa, isalukazi esimzalayo simtshele ukuthi kasiselutho, umfana makazibhekele ozomphekela. 

Nekhehla elimzalayo wawungalizwa selithi: “Mntanami sengikhulile, sengizoya koyihlomkhulu, ngakho bengingathandi ukuba ngikushiye ngingakwakhelanga umuzi.” 

Ngokunjalo namadodakazi ayephekwa ngembiza encane, kungafuneki agugele ezinsisheni.

Ngokwesintu-ke ukuganana kakusikhona nje ukuhlangana kwezithandani ngenhloso yokwakha umuzi owodwa, kepha kungukuhlangana kwalezo zithandani nemindeni yazo, kwakhiwe isihlobo esihle. 

Kwakuhlanganiswa izithandani nemindeni, kuze kuhlanganiswe nedlozi okwakuyikhona okukhulu futhi kwesekele ukuganana njengoba kwakwaziwa okhokho. 

Yilokho okwakwenza uZulu ukuhloniphe kangaka ukuganana. Yonke imininingwane ibiyenziwa ngokucophelela okukhulu. Bekulandelaniswa imikhutshana namasiko ngokulandelana kwawo. Abesilisa bebeyalwa ukuba bangadlali ngabantwana babantu.

Nabesifazane bebedonswa ngendlebe ukuba babambelele emendweni njengoba into okuthiwa yisehlukaniso yayingaziwa.

intombi ezolotsholwa

Phambilini izintombi ezizolotsholwa bezihlukene kabili. Kukhona intombi ezokwedlulisela kuyise emuva kwesikhathi eside niqome-ne. Kukhona futhi intombi ezokumela ngesidwaba kuthiwe iganile.

Ukwedlulisa isoka:

Uma sekufike eqophelweni lokuba umfana azimisele ukuyithatha intombi, ubeya kuyo afike ayicele ukuba imedlulisele kuyise. 

Ngaphakathi izojabula idele intombi kepha kungumkhuba wesiZulu ukuba imane imchilize njena umfana kube sengathi kayiyithandi indaba ayikhulumayo. 

Kuzoze kube yiziwombe ezimbadlwana nje lilokhu linxusa isoka, lona libe lingazi noma isibone abanye abangcono noma yenza ukugcwalisa isiko.

Ekugcineni izovuma intombi, nakhona kayisho ukuthi kulungile kepha imane ithi nje ‘lokho akusikho okwami, kodwa okwa-kho’. 

Usezobonga-ke umfana bese eyohlebela isalukazi esingunina ukuba sibikele ikhehla, eliwuyise.

Intombi emile:

Lapha intombi ebingamqomile umfana, kodwa iqome kwenye indawo (okusho ukuthi isiliqhikiza) kungenzeka ukuba izifumanise ukuthi kayisamthandi lowo mfana. IsiZulu siyayivumela ukuba imale lowo mfana, kepha siyayenqabela leyo ntombi ilungelo lokuphinda iqome okwesibili.

Ngakhoke uma kukhona oyithandayo, ayiqomise, kayisezukubulala umbungu kuye kepha isizomchazela ukuthi kayisemuntu ongabe esaqoma. 

Ngalokho ichaza ukuthi iyamthanda kodwa kufuneka ayithathe; phela nxa ingamthandi izovele imlandulele. Uma umfana ebesafuna ukuqhuba amasu akhe ngayo, uzokwehluleka, kanti uma ebezimisele ukuthatha, uzobonga. 

Usezoyivimbezela ethi ingabe iselulela enhla nengalo (ingabe isabambezela), kodwa ikhulume into ephelayo. Phoke neqhikiza liziphethe, selimnqumela ilanga lokuzolanda impahla. Abonge, avalelise. 

ULWAZI LUCASHUNWE ENCWADINI “KUSADLIWA NGULUDALA”, ISHICILELWE NGABAKWA-SHUTER AND SHOOTER

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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